The New York Womans

From the age of 8 years. How do you qualify your daughter for adulthood?

Puberty is a very difficult period not only for girls, but for many mothers as well, who experience it again, but with even greater fear.

Every mother tries to reassure and calm her daughter, but she may be even more stressed than she is. She doesn't know when to start, what to say, or how to deal with this extremely complex and terrifying stage, or how to answer any potential questions.

Experts advise against waiting for your daughter to come to you with questions about her changing body. That day may never come, especially if she doesn't know it's a good idea to talk to you about this sensitive topic. Instead, it's best to take the initiative and discuss the physical and emotional changes associated with puberty with her early on.

Preparing for Puberty:
Puberty begins for girls at an average age of 10. Some girls experience it as early as 8 years old, while others don't begin until 13. Family counselor Reham Shaheen stresses the importance of mothers talking to their daughters about this stage at 8 years old, before signs of puberty appear.

Puberty goes through several stages, beginning with physical changes such as increased body fat, breast growth, increased height and weight, and the occasional appearance of acne. One or two years after the first signs of puberty appear, the first menstrual period begins.

Confidence and self-acceptance:
Most girls feel insecure about their appearance when they reach this stage, which makes the mother's role important and necessary in reassuring them, restoring their self-confidence, and preparing them psychologically to accept this period.

“A mother should deal with her daughter honestly and openly, and explain to her that the timing of these changes can vary greatly from one girl to another,” Reham told Al Jazeera Net. “The appearance of signs of puberty, as well as mood and hormonal changes, are normal stages of growth that all girls go through, but not always at the same pace. She should encourage her to accept her body shape and not reject it. On the contrary, she should fully appreciate it, respect it, and take into account its privacy.”

What a girl needs to know:
It is wrong to consider puberty and the menstrual period it includes as an embarrassing period, and it is even more wrong for that feeling to be passed on from the mother to her daughter, as it is a natural and necessary matter for the development of her psychological and physical life. The family counselor believes that the mother must be aware of this when talking to her daughter, and make her feel proud of the unique nature that God has given her. Therefore, it is necessary for the mother to know what her daughter needs to know at this stage, the most important of which are:

1- How the body works:
During this period, the girl needs to understand how her body works and why she menstruates. Before asking, the mother should take the initiative to explain what the body does in clear and simple words. This is the nature of a woman’s body, which is qualified to embrace and grow the fetus in the future. The woman is the one who is responsible for pregnancy and childbirth. Before pregnancy and childbirth, ovulation occurs. As long as the girl is still young, she cannot marry or give birth until her physical and psychological development is complete. The uterus expels its inner wall every month and comes out in the form of menstrual blood, which is an important process for the health and safety of the woman.

This bleeding is a sign that a girl's body is beginning to mature. It occurs every 28 days, and she needs to use sanitary pads. It's important to inform her that she may experience some minor pain, and that her menstrual cycle may be irregular at the beginning. She should seek advice from her mother in case of any emergency.

2- Personal hygiene
: The mother should instruct her daughter on the importance of maintaining personal hygiene and bathing regularly.

3- Mood swings:
The mother should explain to her daughter the role of hormones, that there is the hormone estrogen, which is responsible for puberty and regulating the menstrual cycle, and the hormone progesterone, which helps regulate the menstrual cycle, and how hormonal imbalance occurs due to the transition from one physical and psychological stage to another new one.

Hormones affect a girl's mood during this period, and the mother advises her daughter to approach her and speak to her clearly if she experiences any feelings of sadness, distress, or other distress.

4- Respecting the body:
It is important for a girl to know that every woman has gone through puberty and should not feel ashamed of her body or her menstruation.

A mother should support her daughter and make her feel confident and proud of herself. At the same time, she should teach her daughter how to respect and protect her body, and raise her awareness of all types of harassment to which she may be exposed.