The New York Womans

Are you part of the "sandwich generation"? How do you face its psychological and economic challenges?

Are you someone who combines raising children with caring for their parents? If so, you're part of the "sandwich generation," as sociologists call them.

The term "sandwich generation" refers to people aged 35-54, a classification based on responsibilities rather than birth years.

This generation is called this because they are stuck between caring for their growing children and caring for their parents who need support, whether financial, physical, or emotional.

Changing generations and constant challenges

The pioneering gerontologist Dorothy Miller first coined the term "sandwich generation" in a paper she presented at the 1980 annual meeting of the American Gerontological Society, referring to the financial responsibilities and psychological and emotional stress of being sandwiched between caring for multiple generations. The paper was published in the Journal of Social Work in 1981.

At that time, the baby boomer generation—those born between 1946 and 1964—made up most of the "sandwich generation," which now includes millennials. The demographics of the "sandwich generation" change from time to time, but the concept and its challenges remain the same.

Women represent the largest segment

The BBC quotes Athena Vlachantoni, a gerontologist at the University of Southampton, as saying that the number of people responsible for caring for multiple generations is increasing, due to delaying the decision to have children to achieve financial stability and increasing life expectancy. The end result is children and parents needing care at the same time.

According to Flachantoni, the majority of the "sandwich generation" are women, as they are more likely to provide care for their older relatives and are willing to offer all forms of support, while most men's role is usually limited to financial support.

Despite the pressures and multiple responsibilities facing the "sandwich generation," Flachantoni explains that there are some positive aspects: "Healthy grandparents help the women they care for stay in the job market and advance significantly in their careers." This is reinforced by research examining the role of grandparents over the past two decades.

Psychological pressures and financial burdens

In contrast, women are the most affected in the "sandwich generation," feeling more stressed and frustrated than any other age group, according to the 2007 Stress Report issued by the American Psychological Association. The report also revealed an increase in the number of women who reported experiencing severe stress and tension in this age group compared to men in the same age group.

Katherine Nordahl, psychologist and executive director of professional practice at the American Psychological Association, believes that the sandwich generation's struggles, anxiety, and stress are normal and not unusual. However, mothers often put their families' needs first, neglecting or ignoring their own needs.

Nordahl explains that caring for parents' health, children's well-being, and the importance of saving money for college or retirement all contribute to feelings of anxiety and stress.

A set of challenges

The "sandwich generation" faces a number of challenges, the most prominent of which are:

Feeling guilty and afraid of falling short, as if they are not doing enough to help.
Exhaustion and feeling isolated due to not having enough time for most social obligations.
Difficulties at work, and the inability to balance emergency circumstances and professional obligations, such as a parent being hospitalized, especially given the lack of flexibility at work.
Economic pressures, due to having to support their children and their parents' medical, living, and home care needs, prevent them from achieving an adequate level of well-being. According to the Pew Research Center, approximately 21% of middle-aged adults are responsible for providing financial support to a parent.
The risk of mental health issues. A family member may be a struggling teenager, a young person facing financial instability or a senior citizen feeling hopeless, or suffering from Alzheimer's disease. The entire burden falls on the shoulders of the sandwich generation, and if they fail to address these issues, they are vulnerable to depression and burnout.

Tips for managing stress

The American Psychological Association offers a set of strategies that can help the "sandwich generation," especially mothers, manage stress and recover from stress, including:

Identify the sources and causes of stress: Identify the situations that trigger feelings of stress, and determine whether they are related to children, family health, financial decisions, work, or social relationships.
Finding ways to cope with and reduce stress: By assessing behaviors used to overcome the psychological stress resulting from combining childcare with one or both parents.
Stop trying to do everything: It's best to prioritize and delegate responsibilities. Other family members or friends may be able to do some of the tasks to lighten the load and give you some rest.
Setting daily goals and tasks: You can write lists of daily tasks and cross them off when they are completed, to enhance the sense of accomplishment. Some mobile phone applications may be useful for writing down tasks.
Find healthy ways to manage stress and reduce pressure: such as taking a short walk or exercising, and connecting with friends and family in an effort to feel safe, understood, and express what's inside you.
Self-care and a healthy lifestyle: Eat a healthy diet, drink enough water, get enough sleep, and engage in enjoyable activities every day, such as relaxation exercises, so you have the mental and physical energy to care for your children and parents.
Consult a psychologist: This can help you address the underlying feelings behind your fears, better manage stress, and change unhealthy behaviors when dealing with your stress.